The Ultimate Illusion

"We must select the illusion which appeals to our temperament and embrace it with passion, if we want to be happy" - Cyril Connolly

Once a friend talked to me about a problem she had in her life. She started talking about all the negative things, every single negative thing; she let it all out. She seemed so down, so depressed, and she was asking me for advice. Now, I didn’t know what else I could’ve told her to make her feel better; I couldn’t have possibly just grabbed all the negative things from her life and throw it far away, out into space, in order for it to disappear. I was losing hope and thought to myself, I may not be able to help her after all…until I saw a piece of paper and a black pen.

I took the black pen and drew a small dot on the blank piece of paper. I asked my friend, “What do you see?” She looked at me as if I was nuts but she answered my question anyway: “A black dot” she says. I just stared at her for a couple of moments wondering if she knew where I was getting at. “Do you want to know what I see?” I asked her. She just continued staring at me, eyes filled with questions and questions yearning for answers. She probably thought this was totally irrelevant to her problem, but she gave in anyway. “What do you see Yvanne?” I took the piece of paper in my hands, held it up as if it were a priceless treasure and told her “I see white. I see all the beautiful white that overpowers the colour black on this paper. In my eyes, black is just a distant dot, something I shouldn’t even worry about and it’s just there to add some colour to that piece of paper, you know: a bit of adventure.”

It’s funny you know, for some reason it’s every human beings instinct to look at the negative things in their lives first. “My life is not good because _____________!” etc. This is why many people tend to be depressed and sad because they choose to look at the “black dots” on their piece of paper, they never bother looking at the beautiful white surrounding those black dots. I told my friend that there are so many things in her life that she should be thankful about, so many blessings and positive things that cannot just be put aside. There was no doubt that those great things in her life outnumber the negative things she told me about. Then she asked me what happens when she reaches that point in her life where the black dots may outnumber the white, “What if all I see then are a whole bunch of black dots?” I took the pen again and practically filled that sheet with black dots and told her “It’s all a matter of choice.” The beauty of life is in the eyes of the beholder. We may not have realized this yet, but we, as an individual, choose to believe things: we believe the things that we choose. And it’s those simple choices that slowly creates the story of your life. We can choose to see the black dots, or we can choose to see the white space, no matter how little there may be: We can choose to believe we’re not living a good life or we can choose to believe in the beauty of our lives. The beauty of life is in the eyes of the beholder.

My friend was starting to get it, she was starting to understand and see the beauty in her life and was slowly disregarding the negative things. Just when I thought I was done talking, I saw a glass of water.

I filled it up to its half point and asked my friend the same question I asked her about the black dot. “What do you see?” She told me that she saw a cup that’s half empty. I told her, "I see a cup that’s half full." Remember, it’s all a matter of choice. We can choose to believe the negative things; that the cup is already half empty, or the positive things; that the cup is still half full. We believe what we choose to believe, and if we choose the good things in life, we believe we have a good life.

Life is a big illusion; just like the glass of water and the black dot. At first, you don’t know what you should be seeing, you don’t know what to believe in; you just don’t understand. However, the beauty of illusions is that you’re given the power to choose and the power to see only what you want to see; putting aside the things you don’t want to see. It’s hard, I know, our vision can easily be clouded by the negative things in our lives. However, when you reach that line where all you see when you look at that piece of paper is a beautiful white and all you think of when you see that glass of water is how grateful you are that it’s still half full, you feel this certain happiness and satisfaction about your life that you probably never have before because you were too distracted with the black dots and the cup being half empty. Life is a big illusion and it’s all a matter of choice. Remember, the b e a u t y of life is in the e y e s of the b e h o l d e r.

What do YOU see?

Yvanne Dandan

F2XPRESS

You've Got Today

"Tomorrow Is Never Promised"

-Jeremy (Passion) Manongdo

On Saturday February 8, 2008 I watched a concert called “Rockin’ it with Passion and Gabe.” Passion is one of my ultimate inspirations not only musically, but personality wise as well. Behind all of his songs is a message, and with that message, a lesson is learned. Obviously there were songs that taught lessons about love, but above all that, there was one life lesson that struck me that night; “Tomorrow is never promised.” Let’s face it; we are all mortal human beings. Sometimes we take life for granted and we are convinced that we have so much time in our hands.

Sometimes we get too caught up with our teenage lives. Obviously, this section of our life is where we make the biggest adjustment from childhood to adulthood; immaturities to maturity. One of my favorite songs from Passion is a song called “Well Done.” He wrote this for his grandma when she had passed away. He basically didn’t spend enough time with her and when he lost her, he regretted not being there for her as much as he could have and wanted to. He was, just like all of us, caught up with his life; it’s normal.

I read a book by Mitch Albom entitled “For One More Day.” This basically has the same story as the song Well Done by Passion. The main character was the type that looked at his mother like she was just there to ruin his life (typical teenager), but later on in life he loses her. He regrets not spending enough time with his mom and not loving her enough. In this book however, he was given the opportunity to have one more day with his mother. A day where he can give her the love he wasn’t able to show to her before. However the message behind this novel is that: in reality, you are not given another chance, or one more day, what you have now … is what you get. We are all given one life to live and we are never certain as to how many days and moments we could have with the people we love.

Sometimes I get into arguments, whether it be with my friends, my siblings, or my parents and I think to myself, will I be able to say sorry to them tomorrow? Will I be able to regain their trust again? Sometimes I just pray to god and make him promise me that he can give me tomorrow, another day to make it up to those I’ve hurt. But really, no one can make a promise like that. My mind suddenly opened up to another life lesson: “Do it now, or forever wish you had.” Don’t wait another day to say sorry and express your love, because remember “Tomorrow is never promised.”

After hearing Passions’ song and reading Mitch Alboms’ novel, I felt their pain and sadness. I don’t really know how it feels because I was never put into that situation before. I don’t know how I can really relate to them because I never experienced losing someone I love. All I do know is that, I don’t want to have regrets later on in life. I know I’m a teenager, and I know that this is the time of my life where I can easily get caught up. But I also know that just because I am teenager doesn’t mean that I have to have a distant relationship with the people I love. This is the part of my life where, instead, I should learn to appreciate everything about them.

After all of this, my mind opened up to a concluding life lesson: “Live each day and love those around you, as if there isn’t a tomorrow.” If we all did that, can you imagine how much more love would spread around this whole world? Remember, regret is something none of us want to feel. Make sure we live life to the fullest, love and appreciate love with our friends and family, and be happy every morning because we are given another day to show and express love to those around us. Remember: “Tomorrow is never promised…”

Love Like There's No Tomorrow,

Yvanne Dandan

F2XPRESS

The Power of Lies

“The gap between childhood and adulthood is the most difficult for everyone. It’s where you try to outgrow your immaturities and posses a mature mind. In general, it is a hard stage in a person’s life; growing up.” -anonymous

For our second learning/thought we will look at the importance of honesty and goodwill. We will focus on how lying can harm and affect you. This article will mainly revolve around the importance of honesty not only as a teenager, but as well as the honesty of a child to his/her parents. As we teenagers grow up, we have a tendency to keep things from our parents. For example, saying that we’re going to one place, but really we’re going somewhere else. Simple things like that is already doing you harm for it leads to a loss of the trust your parents have for you. Lying is powerful; in a harmful sense.

I would like to start off my article by sharing with you a story I was able to read off the internet. This story really struck me and made me realize how even one lie can be so powerful. This is also the reason why I was inspired to write this article. Hope you guys enjoy “I’m Sorry I Lied.”

This story is not non-fiction, but that does not mean that it cannot happen in real life.

I’m Sorry I Lied

http://www.lovefatedestiny.com/hotlovestories3.htm

Jenny was so happy about the house they had found. For once in her life that was on the right side of town. She unpacked her things with such great ease. As she watched her new curtains blow in the breeze. How wonderful it was to have her own room. School would be starting, she would have friends over soon. There will be sleep-overs, and parties. She was so happy. It's just the way she wanted her life to be.

On the first day of school, everything went great. She made new friends and even got a date! She thought, "I want to be popular and I'm going to be, because I just got a date with the star of the team!" To be known in this school you had to have a clout, and dating this guy would sure help her out. There was only one problem stopping her fate. Her parents had said she was too young to date. "Well I just won't tell them the entire truth. They won't know the difference. What's there to lose?"

Jenny asked to stay with her friends that night. Her parents frowned but said, "All right." Excited, she got ready for the big event. But as she rushed around like she had no sense, she began to feel guilty about all the lies, but what's a pizza, a party, and a moonlight ride? Well the pizza was good, and the party was great, and the moonlight ride would have to wait, for Jake was half drunk by this time.

But he kissed her and said that he was just fine. Then the room filled with smoked and Jake took a puff. Jenny couldn't believe he was smoking that stuff. Now Jake was ready to ride to the point, but only after he'd smoked another joint.

They jumped in the car for the moonlight ride, not thinking that he was too drunk to drive. They finally made it to the point at last, and Jake started trying to make a pass. A pass is not what Jenny wanted at all (and by a pass, I don't mean playing football.) "Perhaps my parents were right. Maybe I am too young. Boy, how could I ever, ever be so dumb?" With all of her might, she pushed Jake away, "Please take me home, I don't want to stay."

Jake cranked up the engine and floored the gas. In a matter of seconds they were going too fast. As Jake drove on in a fit of wild anger, Jenny knew that her life was in danger. She begged and pleaded for him to slow down, but he just got faster as they neared the town. "Just let me get home! I'll confess that I lied. I really went out for a moonlight ride."

Then all of a sudden, she saw a big flash. "Oh God, Please help us! We're going to crash!" She doesn't remember the force of impact. Just that everything all of a sudden went black. She felt someone remove her from the twisted rubble, and heard, "Call an ambulance! These kids are in trouble!" Voices she heard, a few words at best. But she knew there were two cars involved in the wreck.

Then wondered to herself if Jake was all right, and if the people in the other car was alive. She awoke in the hospital to faces so sad. "You've been in a wreck and it looks pretty bad." These voices echoed inside her head, as they gently told her that Jake was dead. They said "Jenny, we've done all we can do. But it looks as if we'll lose you too." "But the people in the other car?" Jenny cried. "We're sorry, Jenny, they also died."

Jenny prayed, "God, forgive me for what I've done. I only wanted to have just one night of fun." "Tell those people's family, I've made their lives dim, and wish I could return their families to them." "Tell Mom and Dad I'm sorry I lied, and that it's my fault so many have died. Oh, nurse, won't you please tell them that for me?"

The nurse just stood there. She never agreed. But took Jenny's hand with tears in her eyes. And a few moments later Jenny died. A man asked the nurse, "Why didn't you do your best to bid that girl her one last request?" She looked at the man with eyes so sad. "Because the people in the other car were her mom and dad."

---

This story really opened my eyes to see the reality of life. Life is short, and we should really be living it to the fullest; but not through game and means of harm, especially towards our parents who we should be honest to. We should be telling them about where we’re going and who we’re with. I know that we have our own life, and it’s our life, so why should we always consult them about what we do with it? But remember, yes it is your life, but they are a part of your life and they do care about you. They only want what’s best! Think about the story above, and recall the lie that Jenny told her parents. She wasn’t allowed to have a boyfriend, but she did, and she told her parents she would be out with her friends; she didn’t mention anything about Jake. It's such a small lie and she didn't think that it would lead to much harm and because of this lie, she put not only herself in a bad situation, but as well as Jake, her friends, and her very own parents. Lying is not good, and it is a very powerful and harmful thing. The truth may hurt, but a lie will hurt forever


Stay Honest and Be a Good Child,
Yvanne Dandan
F2XPRESS

"Chasing Pavements"

"Should I give up, or should I just keep chasing pavements..."

-Chasing Pavements, Adele

Have you ever been in love with someone who you know may never love you back? If you have, you know how much that hurts. There's no better feeling than loving someone you know loves you back; a mutual understanding. However, when you're the only one that loves, it just doesn't feel right. "Should I give up, or should I just keep chasing pavements" Let's only look at this very small but significant portion of the song and put aside the rest of the lyrics. This is a situation where you're confused and you don't know what step you should take next.

Should I Give Up: When we love and get nothing in return, we can easily get discouraged and just let go. It's unfair to have that unbalanced situation where one gives love and the other is only getting the love. This is even worse when you know that you love this certain person purely and just loving them and not getting anything in return can be enough for you at times. But what's most important is that we know exactly what we want. Loving someone is a great thing, but are you content with not getting anything in return? Would you be okay if all you did was hope for his/her love and find out that in the end you still won't get anything from that long wait? Would you?

Chasing Pavements: Everytime I think about giving up, I always remember this one quote that opened my eyes a couple years ago: "Before you let go, remember why you held on for so long" Like I said earlier, at certain times it may just be enough for you to love someone and have that one way relationship. This is possible because you don't necessarily need a person to love you in order to love them. It hurts though, knowing that they may not love you back. But when love strikes its bow, it really hits you hard and it's not easy to just let go: as human beings, we like to hope, "even if it may lead no way."

Have you ever been in love with someone who you know may never love you back? It hurts, it really does and only time can tell how your problem can be solved. Letting go is such a big decision to make, but chasing pavements can get tiring after a while. If you think it's worth hanging on to, go for it! Just remember to think of yourself as well and what will make you happy. Everything is really up to you.

"Things happen for a reason, and if it's meant to be, it will happen for you"

Make the right choice,

Yvanne Dandan

F2XPRESS